The big day: Tips for photographing your first wedding (part one)

By Anthony McKee | 8 August 2024

One of the saddest days of my professional photography career was spent watching an amateur photograph my niece’s wedding.

Admittedly it was COVID and my sister had booked a workmate in the knowledge that border closures might have stopped me from getting to the wedding, but the borders opened.

As I was preparing to travel I offered to shoot the wedding alongside this other photographer (a maths teacher); sadly the offer was declined.

As it happened, the wedding day was on one of the flattest, greyest days I had ever seen in Sydney and while a more experienced photographer would have been getting creative with their lighting, this photographer was struggling; his understanding of light was out there with my understanding of calculus.

Being asked to shoot a friend or relative’s wedding is a flattering endorsement of your skills as a photographer, but it can also be a big challenge, particularly when the day doesn’t go as planned.

Years ago American photographer Gregory Heisler commented, “how many photographers does it take to change a light bulb?”. The answer – “500 – one to change the light bulb and 499 to say they could have done it better!”. It is a rather true comment, not because photographers are a cynical bunch, far from it, but every photographer has their own unique vision.

You can quite literally take a dozen experienced photographers, ask them to photograph the same wedding couple under identical conditions and you will get a dozen very different results.

This couple were University of Melbourne alumni and so we made the formal photos on the campus grounds. On seeing these two students working on their laptops I asked if they’d mind if I plonked the wedding couple into the middle of the scene and I went on to make this image. Nikon D3, 24-70mm f/2.8 lens @ 32mm. 1/250s @ f8, ISO 400.

That’s what I love about photography – there is no real “right way” to make a photo, there are just good photos, great photos, and “oh wow, I wish that was my shot” photos.

That being said, there are also average photos and even bad photos. As readers will know from their own professional careers, novices will often assume they are doing a great job, usually because they lack the knowledge of what can be achieved, and how to achieve it.

Most of Australia’s best wedding photographers didn’t just buy a camera one day and start shooting weddings; most started off by assisting for a year or two until they were good enough to shoot weddings on their own.

I can’t remember if this photo was set up or not, but noticing the two young page boys had disposable cameras, I probably asked them to make a photo of me making a photo of them.

While assisting though, they were also learning about camera technique, composition, ambient light, strobe lighting, styling, attention to detail, creativity, moment, emotion, organisational skills, people skills and adaptability.

There is nothing wrong with agreeing to photograph a friend or relative’s wedding, even if you are relatively inexperienced. What is important is that before committing to the job, you have an honest discussion with the couple about their hopes for the day, and your level of comfort in making their photos.

If both parties agree you will be happy with the finished photos no matter what, then you are good to go.

I did get to see most of my niece’s wedding photos and while they were passable (yes, they were in focus and reasonably exposed), the work felt like it had been shot on a really sad, grey day.

Yes, the couple were happy with the photos, but then again, I doubt neither they nor the photographer realised what could have been achieved under the same circumstances.

With all that in mind, here are some tips for photographing your first wedding.

When my old neighbours Ben and Katie got married recently, they had two photographers, myself and one of Katie’s work colleagues, Grace. When Grace saw the chance for a photo in front a car park building, I decided to go looking in the opposite direction and came up with this image. Nikon D850, 70-200mm f/2.8 lens @ 130mm. 1/250s @ f2.8, ISO 100.

1) Be honest with yourself

Be honest about your skill levels to the wedding couple – and to yourself. Anyone can make a good photo when the conditions are right, but what happens if the wedding day is overcast and raining, or the lighting at an indoor venue is challenging, or the mother-in-law takes a dislike to you?

Taking on the role of a wedding photographer means knowing how to work with any conditions the day throws at you, and more often than not, this comes down to your experience as a photographer.

If you are honest with the couple and they are comfortable with your level of experience (or lack thereof) then at least you have established a set of expectations for the day.

Visiting a venue prior to a wedding gives you a chance to explore and plan for some of the more interesting ideas. This window was on the first floor of a building, and given it was going to be near impossible to make this photo from street level I brought along my drone to quickly get this photo.

2) Work to a plan

Most couples have a fairly good idea of what they expect from the day; some might want formal photos at exotic locations, while others might want to keep things low key.

What is important is that you listen to their ideas, discuss the practicalities (weather options, travel times, location access etc) and then create a plan that you all work to on the day.

I usually like to explore the wedding venue and photo locations with the couple a few days before the wedding; by then you know what the weather and light conditions are likely to be on the day.

One of the challenges of being a wedding photographer is keeping aware of everything that is going on around you. While some people can often get fixated looking at the bride, it can often be the little people in the scene that can make for the interesting photos. Nikon D700, 24-70mm f2.8 lens @ 48mm. 1/100s @ f3.2, ISO 800.

At each venue, make a note of where the sun will be at different times of the day, and check the sunset time (given the chance I often try to sneak in some photos with the couple in the last light of day).

And of course, plan for rain; I have seen a perfect summer wedding turn to chaos in minutes thanks to a thunderstorm. It happens!

One of the favourite photos I like to make on the day is a group shot with everyone in picture. All you need is a ladder, a nice patch of favourable light and a wide lens.

3) Practice, Practice, Practice

Believe it or not, professional photographers often practice and test their ideas before a big job, just as musicians rehearse before a concert. If you can afford the time, take a friend to the proposed wedding locations before the big day and try making some portraits.

Find the interesting settings, learn what the light is doing and explore how to make your ideas work. Open shade is often good for wedding portraits, but it’s important to note where the light is coming from too; open shade from overhead can be as unflattering as direct sunlight.

A light modifier such as a large reflector can be very useful on the day but note that they can be tricky to use in windy conditions.

This front door and stairway of a house, along with some soft lighting provided nice setting for this portrait of the groom and his groomsmen.

Look out for part two next week.